Second Sense of Perspective
Second Life is a lot of things, good and bad. For me, Second Life is all about entertainment and some social activity - as it seems to be designed for. The dark side of Second Life is when it becomes a force for dragging yourself down. Whenever I feel Second Life is being more of a negative than a positive to myself, I just remember what I am here for, having a good time.
I see and talk to a lot of people who get dragged down into the abyss of some sort of negative drama. It usually comes up subtly, creeping up slowly, engulfing their thinking and consuming their Second Life and eventually their Real Life. This is a “bad thing” - something to be avoided. Maybe it is impossible to avoid if you have anything beyond a casual relationship with anyone in Second Life. I would like to think it does not happen to me, but of course it does now and then.
I have met a lot of really interesting and neat people in Second Life. To be honest, there’s no one I have found I dislike. I feel worse that there is not enough of “me” to go around to pay attention to all of the friends I have met. I have been in Second Life now for close to a year, and upon reflection of that last year, I find that from a close relationship side it has not been all that positive for myself. Maybe that’s a good thing, maybe not.
Second Life experiences in general are a bit lonely and detached. I think that’s a reason why people partner up in Second Life, to have someone to do things with, rather than alone. Typically, you are lone while you are at your computer in Second Life, and it seems less alone while doing something with another avatar. My personal experience with doing that with someone else has been alas, very poor. Maybe I’m too much like a Neko, I like doing my own thing.
I have also noticed a distinct evolution of personal habits and behaviors within Second Life. Starting with typically n00b wonderment, then on to shopaholic, avatar tweaking, clubbing, dancing, flirting, etc. Then on to more semi-serious things like blogging, group activities and socializing. But still problems with serious relationships. My FAQ probably does a lot to explain it. A combination of flirtiness and stand-off-ishness is never good for relationships.
Another bad habit I have is willingness to try just about anything, at least once. Experiences are something to be tried in life, after all, you might not get to try them again. I’ve tried a lot of things in Second Life, some have been good, some have been flops. In the last month or so, I have been struggling with Second Life. It’s a common theme with most of you other bloggers I think. Some of my closest Second Life friends have been off grid for sometime and I am struggling with a failing Second Life relationship.
The funk has been bad enough I have considering retiring or going off grid for a while. The last time I had this sort of problem in Second Life was back in January and then I decided that I was not going to allow myself to be chased off the grid by myself, so I stayed. I’ll probably stay at least this time.
Where I’m going with this is I am struggling to find a purpose inside Second Life. I am somewhat depressed about the relationship failures. I somewhat feel I should take the majority of the fault for their failure. Maybe I am looking for too much or unwilling to give enough. Maybe the real route for me in Second Life is friendships rather than something like a “marriage”.
I’m still just trying to figure it out….
-Veyron
